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| The Warmest Kitchen | |
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| Category | Story Event |
| Type | Story |
| Data ID | 291261 |
The Warmest Kitchen is a Sunless Skies Story Event.
Story description[]
You are assailed with a wave of warmth and the aroma of bacon cooking on the cavernous stove. It seems that the real party is in here. Champagne corks pop. Someone is playing a viol. Cards are slapped onto the wooden table. A dozen flushed faces turn towards you, all beaming.
Trigger conditions[]
Location: Langley Hall
Area: Limbo
Frequency: Always (100%)
Interactions[]
| Actions | Requirements | Effects | Notes |
|---|---|---|---|
| Investigate the stove for a lost sigil
The fire inside crackles merrily. Is anyone tending it or is just operating under its own power?
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Failed event | |
| Probed with a poker
The coals pop as you prod and shove them aside. Suddenly, a stack of fuel collapses, scattering lumps of coal to the ground. "Watch it!" A card player's trouser leg is scalded, and you are subjected to a round of disapproving tuts.
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| Successful event | |||
| Probed with a poker
The coals pop as you shove them to one side. The neat stack of fuel collapses, sending a wave of heat towards you. Your face and arms are slick with sweat. But, there, just at the back, you can make out a sigil, burning brighter than the smouldering coals.
 The Revelation that Uncertainty is Itself an Answer
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| Have yourself dealt in
The game looks... complex.
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Failed event |
Advanced query needs investigation |
| Spreadsheets
There are two hundred and fourteen cards, compiled from a variety of decks, so that though there are six Aces of Bats, each bears a different hue and a different function within the game. You may pair Sixes, Queens and Fours, but never Sevens. An Ace held for more than seven rounds can be exchanged for another card, but you may not choose which.
Most of the other players are as baffled as you, but one rogue has been making notes on the rules. A considered effort of mathematics propels her into victory, and to the victor, the spoils.
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| Successful event | |||
| Luck of the draw
There are two hundred and fourteen cards, compiled from a variety of decks, so that though there are six Aces of Bats, each bears a different hue and a different function within the game. You may pair Sixes, Queens and Fours, but never Sevens. An Ace held for more than seven rounds can be exchanged for another card, but you may not choose which.
The other players muddle through, seemingly as mystified as you are. The dealer is a wizened old man. He does not play, but he does arbitrate the rules with extreme vigour. You come out ahead, though you're not sure how.
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| Talk to the Notorious Flirt
She disarms would-be-suitors with bon mots that stay just on this side of good taste.
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Cut to the quick
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| Help with the cooking
A party runs on its stomach.
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Failed event | |
| Unhelpful
The cook in the ocelot patterned apron observes you for five minutes before walking away to take an extended cigar break. The smoke is easily dealt with and you only lose half of the pans to the flames. Eventually, the sous-chef rescues you. Most of your attempt is ejected from a window. What can be rescued is packed into a box and unceremoniously handed to you.
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| Successful event | |||
| Grudging acceptance
The cook with the ocelot patterned apron raises an eyebrow at your methodology, but does nothing to inhibit you beyond insisting that every dish contain a nip or three of cider. This comes from a flask in her apron – she gives you a wink every time she produces it.
You create a bounty of sweetmeats and pasties: roasted cantakeri and chorister parcels, delicious squirmings – fried Worlebury-style. The cook tastes everything. She says nothing, but she does produce a hamper. She orders you to take a portion of everything before the other guests get their mitts on it.
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| Search for Lord Langley
You were told he was on good terms with the cook. Perhaps she knows where he is now. A donation to the kitchen would probably help you out.
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Failed event | |
| Grudging help
The cook listens to your entreaty with a stony expression on her face. As you finish, she makes no sign she paid any attention to a word of it. She lets you sweat for several minutes before opening an iron door concealed in the range.
"Here," she grunts, producing a battered pair of black dancing shoes. "Told me to always keep these handy. In case he ever shows up. I think he's been gone long enough, now. You take them to him." She makes a face. "He made me almost empty our pantries for his trip. Must have carried off at least three baskets. Last I saw of him was him bent double hauling my finest." She smiles to herself.
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| Successful event | |||
| Too long gone
The cook's expression remains neutral. She makes no sign she paid any attention to a word you said. When you're finished, she turns away to the stove, bends, and opens an iron door concealed in the range.
"Here," she grunts, producing a battered pair of black dancing shoes. "Told me to always keep these handy. In case he ever shows up. I think he's been gone long enough, now. You take them to him." She makes a face. "He made me almost empty our pantries for his trip. Must have carried off at least three baskets. Last I saw of him was him bent double hauling my finest." She smiles to herself. She refuses to take payment.
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| Rescue the rabbit
A twitching pink nose reveals itself among a mountain of fresh onions.
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Yes. Yes, that is your Obviously Delicious Rabbit there. It shakes free of its vegetable sepulchre, causing a few onions to roll onto the ground. No one takes notice. No one says anything as you ferry the Obviously Delicious Rabbit away, its fur smelling of salted meats and cinnamon oil and .... vanilla?
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Advanced query needs investigation Advanced alteration value probably needs examination.
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| Speak with the Clerk of Sevens
She wrestling the cork out of a wine bottle.
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Pop!
The wine glugs cheerfully. "Isn't that the most beautiful sound? Please – have a glass."
The Clerk is constantly distracted by greetings from those entering the kitchen. "Sorry! Didn't expect to recognise this many. I can't believe so many of those I knew found their way through the Avid Horizon." She hasn't yet seen Langley. "Not that I'm surprised. Back then, I gave him what he needed to keep building the Hall. He's probably still working on it." She shrugs. "I intend to keep coming back here from the Forge; we'll run into each other eventually" She's summoned to the card table. With apologies, and another thank you, she's dealt in. |
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| Return to the hallway
Somewhere that doesn't smell of courgette.
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 The Hallowed Hallway
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Links[]
Links In[]
The Hallowed Hallway, Traversing the Staircases, The Revelation that Uncertainty is Itself an Answer
Links Out[]
The Hallowed Hallway, The Revelation that Uncertainty is Itself an Answer
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